Christina, the goddess of justice (a video play in 2 acts) By Stephen Crawford (Goyahthlay@Hotmail.com) A fat woman finds an alternative to losing weight. Ah, the wonders of modern science. The play begins in a doctor's office. The physician is a young female, barely 30. She has blonde hair, "cover-girl" looks, and a slender body. Her hair is fastened, drawn into a tight bun. She is wearing a lab coat (short), pumps, and a sexy skirt. There is a stethoscope around her neck, and glasses resting against her nose. The doctor is holding a clipboard. An overweight woman is standing on a scale (stage left). Her name is Christina. Despite the extra pounds, Christina is also young and beautiful. She could be a plus-sized model. Christina is sparsely dressed. She is barefoot, wearing a one-piece bathing suit. Christina steps off of the scale. She examines herself in the mirror (stage left). Christina: (with a great deal of enthusiasm) Look at my hips, doc! Look at my waist! Look at my breasts! Doctor: You've gained 80 pounds, Christina. You've gained 80 pounds in 12 months. That's a lot of weight. Christina: All of my skirts are too tight. Christina adjusts the straps on her bathing suit. Christina: None of my tank tops fit. They're all too snug. You should see the way they cling to my breasts. Doctor: When it comes to weight-reduction, there is no standard approach. A program that is appropriate for one person, may not be appropriate for another. Don't get me wrong, Christina. Some approaches are dangerous, even fraudulent. There are still a number of options. We need to find the program that is best for you. Christina: I always wear tank top shirts in the summer. (flexing her pudgy arms) Look at my arms. They're huge. The doctor pauses for a moment. She removes her glasses. Doctor: The first step is to decide how serious your weight problem is. You've gained a lot of weight Christina. You've gained a lot of weight in a very short period of time. You might consider joining a self-help group, a commercial weight-loss program. I recommend a behavioral program led by a health professional. Christina: Every week I try to squeeze myself into the same pair denim shorts, and every week it becomes more and more difficult. Christina takes her shorts from the examination table. She holds them in front of herself. Christina: I can barely pull them over her hips, let alone my waist. My thighs are so big that they are actually splitting the seams. Look at my ass, doc! It's huge! I'm going to have to buy a larger size, just like last month, and the month before that, and the month before that. Doctor: (taking an abrupt tone) Are you listening? The doctor pauses for a moment. She smiles sweetly. Doctor: Christina, you're not alone. Thousands of Americans are suffering from the same affliction. They understand the psychological problems that go along with being overweight, the depression, the low self-esteem, the negative body image. Christina: What are you talking about? I feel great! Doctor: (pause) What? Christina: Look at me, doc. I'm beautiful. I have wide hips. I have a thick waist. I have big breasts. (caressing the outline of her figure) I'm an hourglass, but I hold a lot more sand. Doctor: You're not upset? Christina: Not at all. Doctor: Why not? I mean... You gained 80 pounds. Christina: Some women are shaped like pares. They look horrible when they gain weight. Their hips are twice the size of their shoulders. Some women are big on top, but small on the bottom. They have skinny legs and tiny ankles. Some women are loose and flabby. Everything sags. My body is different. Only the volume increases. It's simple geometry. Christina takes a few steps back. Christina: Damn! I look good! Doctor: How did you manage to gain so much weight? Christina: I love to eat. I love Recies Peanut Butter Cups. I love to hold them between my thumb and index finger, carefully nibbling around the edges. I always have a lame excuse: "I shouldn't be doing this, but it's Saturday. I've been good all week. Two little peanut butter cups aren't going to hurt me." Fifteen minutes later, I'm eating a Nestle Crunch bar. An hour goes by. I'm munching on a bag of potato chips. Then I decide to visit the donut shop. I have a sudden craving for glaze. I better take two. They're small. 6 o'clock rolls around. It's time for dinner. I better take the chicken out of the oven. Thirty minutes go by. I'm trying to decide whether I want peach or raspberry ice cream. Doctor: I see. Christina: (grabbing her fat thighs) Take a look at these thighs. There is no cottage cheese on these thighs. (grabbing her ass) There are no dimples on this ass. I don't have saddlebags. I don't have stretch marks. Christina looks at herself in the mirror. Christina: I have thick, soft, beautiful flesh. That's what I have. The doctor takes a bathrobe from the coat rack. The coat rack is to the right of the examination table. The doctor hands the bathrobe to Christina. Christina puts her arms through the sleeves, wrapping the robe around her waist. Doctor: You're taking this very well. I admire your optimism. Recent surveys indicate that 40% of Americans are unhappy with their bodies. This is especially true for women. You gained 80 pounds, and you're elated. Christina: Do you know why women are unhappy with their bodies? They are trying to impress men. I don't care what some scrawny geek says about my body. It's my body. I'm not going to worry about it. I'm not going to let some "guy" push me around. I'm a big girl. I have the advantage. If I decide to slam into somebody, his... I mean... that person's body is going to yield to mine. Doctor: I admire your optimism, but you are 80 pounds overweight. That's a serious health risk. You're more likely to get diabetes, to have high cholesterol, to have heart problems... Christina: Doc... Doctor: You're more likely to get high blood pressure, to develop cancer, to have problems with your gallbladder,... Christina: Doc... Doctor: You are more likely to develop a kidney disease, a bone disorder, a joint disorder... Christina: Doctor!!! (pause) I get the picture. I'll lose weight. I just hate to lose this body. Doctor: (pause) There may be an alternative. It is still in the experimental stages. It's very dangerous. (pause) Forget it. It's not for you. Christina: What is it? Doctor: It's a medical procedure. But it's very dangerous. It's not for you. Christina: What is it? Doctor: (reluctantly) It's called composition transfer. Christina: What is composition transfer? Doctor: It's hard to explain. Christina: (annoyed) Go ahead. (in a fake Harvard accent) I have faith in your ability to articulate its scientific complexities. Doctor: (smiling sweetly) Okay. The human body can be divided into two parts, lean mass and fat. Lean mass is all of the body's nonfat tissue: your bones, cartilage, organs, water weight, teeth, and (clearing her throat) muscles. Christina: What's wrong with body fat? Don't you need body fat? Doctor: There are two types of body fat, essential fat and nonessential fat. You're right, Christina. You need body fat. It helps your body function. You can't live without it. Women have more (making quotation marks with her fingers) "essential" fat than men. Christina: Why do women have more essential fat? Doctor: We carry fat in our breasts, in our uterus, (caressing her hips/ass) and in other sties that specific to us as women. Men don't bare children. Christina: What is nonessential fat? Doctor: Nonessential fat is excess fat, fat that is stored in the fat cells. Christina: Is it harmful? Doctor: Yes. It's harmful. It's harmful to your health. Christina: Okay. What is composition transfer? Doctor: Composition transfer is a radioactive treatment. It breaks down the molecular structure of nonessential fat, turning it into lean body tissue. Christina: I don't get it. What does this have to do with weight reduction? Doctor: There is no weight reduction, but there is a reduction of fat. Christina: Nonessential fat? Doctor: That's right, nonessential fat. Consider the following example. Woman A and woman B are the same height. They are both 5 feet, and 5 inches tall. They both weigh 130 pounds. Woman A is an endurance runner. She has 15% body fat. Woman B is a housewife. She has 32% body fat. Neither of these women is overweight, but the second woman is over-fat. Composition transfer allows us to break down the molecular structure of nonessential fat. The fat is reassembled, but it isn't assembled as fat. It becomes lean body tissue. Christina: I get it. Woman B doesn't lose weight, but she loses fat. Doctor: That's right. Christina: What else happens? Doctor: Her muscles get bigger. Christina's eyes light up with excitement. Christina: I want this treatment. Doctor: Christina, the acceptable level of body fat is somewhere between 20 and 30 percent. If we bring you down to 25 percent body fat, you will still weigh 210 pounds. All of that weight will be transferred to your muscles. You'll be huge. You'll look like Arnold Schwarzenegger. Christina: I want this treatment. I don't care how much it costs. I want this treatment. Doctor: The treatment is free. The medical community wants 5 volunteers. The committee has already chosen the other four. They are all men. Christina: Who's all men? Are you referring to the volunteers, or the committee? Doctor: I'm referring to both. If you are selected, you will be the first woman to receive B.C.T. Christina: What's B.C.T.? Doctor: B.CT is the treatment, "Body Composition Transfer." (pause) It's very risky. We're not sure what the side effects will be. We're not even sure that it will work. The doctor pauses. She changes the subject. Doctor: Like I said, there is no standard approach to weight reduction. There are a variety of diets to choose from. I suggest... Christina: ...Doctor, I want this treatment. Women have more nonessential fat. You said so yourself. I want this treatment. You can sponsor me. Doctor: It will never work, Christina. You're wasting your time. Christina: You don't understand. This is a dream come true. I've always wanted to be big, strong, and powerful. I used to have these... (pause) fantasies. Doctor: What kind of fantasies? Christina: It's kind of embarrassing. Doctor: Tell me about it. Christina: Have you ever studied Greek mythology? Doctor: Yes, when I was in college. Christina: I always wanted to be a goddess. I always wanted to be Themis, the goddess of justice. Doctor: (giggling) The goddess of justice? You'll have to refresh my memory. Christina: She was a Titan. Doctor: Oh yes! The Titans! I remember the Titans. Uranus and Gaea had 12 children. They were all giants. They were all incredibly strong. (giggling) You wanted to be a Titan? Tell me about it. Christina: It all started when I was 14-years-old. I was walking barefoot through the living room. Doctor: Go on. Christina: My bother used to collect Star War memorabilia. He always left his action figures lying around house. Doctor: Go on. Christina: (smiling) There he was, Han Solo. He was propped up against the leg of the coffee table, a tiny version of Harrison Ford. He was so small, so fragile. Doctor: (laughing) Yeah... Christina: I began thumping toward him with the full force of my weight. Thump, thump, thump. Doctor: Keep going. Christina: Mr. Solo was seconds from being trampled. Thump, thump, thump. (in a deep voice) Here comes Themis, the goddess of justice. Thump, thump, thump. I sat down in the recliner, my throne. Han Solo was groveling at my toes. He was begging me not to crush him, not to smother him under my heavy arch. I was his goddess. I was his Titan. I... Doctor: ...(smiling) Christina, can I be frank? Christina: Sure. Doctor: (laughing) You're a very strange woman, (pause) but I like you. I'll recommend you for the treatment. Christina: Thank you doctor! Act II, Scene I Christina is sitting in bed (center stage). She looks exhausted. Christina's eyes are closed. She is wearing a sleeveless nightgown. We can see Christina's shoulders, and her chubby arms. A blanket is covering Christina's hips. It has been pulled over her waist as well. The blanket ends at Christina's bosom. Christina is propped up against some pillows. The pillows are propped up against the backboard of Christina's bed. Christina's doctor enters the room. She is dressed like a surgeon. The doctor is wearing operating clothes (a pair of scrubs). Her hair in tied in a bun. The doctor removes her cap. She unties her hair, allowing it to fall past her shoulders. Doctor: Congratulations, Christina! The committee tells me that the operation was a success. We made an assessment this afternoon. As of 9 o'clock this morning, 5 percent of your unessential fat has been converted into muscle. This is the fastest rate of transfer yet. How do you feel? Christina: (half asleep) I'm a little tired. Doctor: That's to be expected. The process drains your body of energy. Ultimately, your energy level is going to rise dramatically. We have calculated a five percent transfer every 48 hours. Every 48 hours, five percent of your unessential fat will be converted into muscle. Your body is going to look different, very different. You are getting stronger, even as we speak. Your endurance is rising steadily. Your body is becoming a work of art. There is a wooden chair next to Christina's bed (stage right). The doctor sits down in the chair. She begins to stroke Christina's hair. Doctor: (tenderly) Your shoulders are already starting to develop. Your chest, your back, and your arms are becoming more and more muscular. Your legs are getting stronger and stronger. Christina: Bigger, stronger, better. The doctor stands up and paces back and forth. Doctor: That's right. You'll be able to move some serious weight. In fact, you will be 3 ' times stronger than the average man. You'll be able to hit harder, throw farther, and do more push-ups. You'll be able to climb ropes. You'll be able to run long distances. The physical demands of everyday life will be much easier to cope with. You will have no problem carrying groceries, lifting boxes, or climbing stairs. The weight room is going to be fun and exciting. You are going to be amazed at what you can do: chin ups, squats, leg presses, curls, bench presses, dips. A 185 pound man will have to struggle just to keep up with you. You'll blow him away. Christina: I'll blow him away. Doctor: (standing still) That's right. We are estimating 157 pounds of lean body mass, and only 53 pounds of body fat. You won't be as lean as a professional athlete, but your muscles will be enough to make them sigh in vein. You are going to be a Titan after all. Christina: (smiling) The goddess of justice. Doctor: (laughing) Get some rest. I'll see you in a few days. Act II, Scene II Christina is running on a treadmill. She is wearing a blue leotard. The top half of the leotard looks like a tank top. The bottom half looks like a pair of bicycle shorts. Christina is wearing a new pair of sneakers, blue converse all-stars (the original high-tops). Christina's transformation is complete. She has slender hips and a narrow waist. Her ass is much smaller. Her glutes are much tighter. Needless to say, the doctor's promise has been fulfilled. Christina has the powerful (I emphasize the word powerful) physique of a professional athlete. She looks like a bodybuilder, a heavyweight champion during the off-season. Christina isn't tan. She isn't vascular. She isn't sculpted. She isn't cut. But she is big. She is very big. Her biceps are 19 inches thick. Her legs are enormous. Christina's thighs are much wider than her hips. The front of her thighs are bulging forward, curving past her knees. This "curve" is especially prominent when Christina's knees are locked in place. Her inner thighs are always touching. Christina's calves are incredible. They are muscular. They are very muscular (20 inches thick). Christina's shoulders are muscular as well. They are broad. They are incredibly broad. Like everything else, Christina's chest is thick with muscle. There is a hard indentation along her clavicle. This "indentation" is formed by the barreling of Christina's chest. Needless to say, Christina has compromised the fullness of her bosom. She has sacrificed her breasts. Christina doesn't seem to mind. Her chest is still large. As I said before, Christina has broad shoulders. They are solid. They are very solid. Christina's shoulders are definitely her new point of vanity. They look like a couple of bowling balls, two bowling balls exploding from Christina's clavicle, supported by the bowing of her muscular shoulder blades. Christina's doctor enters the room. She is dressed in plain clothes (jeans and a button-down flannel). Her hair is down. She is wearing a pair of hiking boots. Christina doesn't notice that the doctor has entered the room. Christina continues to run on the treadmill. The doctor sneaks up behind Christina. Doctor: (in a theatrical voice) Long live Themis, the powerful goddess of justice. Christina turns around and smiles. The doctor extends her arms. She has places her hands flat, so that her palms are facing downward. The doctor bows her head slowly. She lifts her eyes gracefully, giving Christina a warm smile. Christina reduces the speed on her treadmill. She gradually stops. Christina takes a dry towel from the handlebar. She is dabbing her forehead. Christina tilts her head slightly. She holds the towel against the back of her neck. Christina lets the towel hang there for a while. Christina: (out of breath) 15 percent body fat! That's my goal. 25 percent is too high for a goddess. Christina pauses and smiles. Christina: I'm glad you came. (sincerely) Thank you. Doctor: You look great, Christina! You look great. Arnold better watch out. (pause) Today is your last day. You've been discharged. I thought we'd do lunch. It's my treat. Do you have any suggestions? I bet you're quite the connoisseur. Christina: I didn't gain 80 pounds by starving. The doctor laughs. Christina crosses to the dresser. She pulls out a pair of jeans. She holds them up in front of herself. Christina: They were tailor-made. They're designed to fit my thighs. There is a scene (setting) change. Christina and her doctor are walking along an urban sidewalk. Christina is still wearing the blue leotard. She is also wearing the tailor-made jeans. There is a pink cardigan on Christina's arm. People are staring. Christina is grinning from ear to ear. She loves the attention. Christina is walking alongside her doctor. Needless to say, Christina has a lot more mass. She demands more space. Christina's shoulders are twice as broad. She has to maneuver gracefully through the small crowd. Occasionally she brushes against someone. Christina isn't used to her new size. Christina stops. She is pointing straight ahead. Christina: (to the doctor) There it is. Are you sure you like Japanese food? Suddenly we hear a scream. A young man is running past Christina. The man bushes the side of Christina's shoulder. He loses his balance. The man stumbles to his left, falling on the ground. The man is dressed in a black pair of jeans. He is wearing a blue and white shirt (checkered), and a knit cap (black). The man is 5 feet and 8 inches tall, the same height as Christina. He is lucky if he weighs 140 pounds. (from the crowd) Stop! Thief! Christina notices that the man has dropped a ladies purse. The man makes eye contact with Christina. He begins to stumble forward. He does this with a great sense of urgency. (from the crowd) Stop! Thief! The "thief" quickly makes his way through the crowd. Christina hands her sweater to the doctor. She begins to chase after him. Christina is dodging through the crowd with her massive body. She is shoving helpless businessmen out of the way, knocking them down with the slightest nudge of her shoulder. The thief is able to maneuver more easily through the crowd. Christina knows that she will probably lose him. Christian runs past a newspaper dispenser. She grabs the handle that opens the door. Needless to say, the door is locked. Christina gives the handle a firm tug, ripping the entire door off of the metal hinge. She holds the door above her head, giving a high-pitched yell. A path is immediately cleared. People are frightened. They have watched a 210 pound woman rip the door off of a newspaper dispenser. Now she is screaming. Nobody wants to get in her way. Christina has access to the thief. The thief continues to run. The thief is about 25 feet away. Christina tosses the metal door like Frisbee. She nails the thief in the back. The thief falls forward. He hits the ground, dropping the stolen purse. Christina runs toward the thief. She takes him by the collar of his shirt, and grabs the back of his jeans. Christina lifts the thief high into the air, tossing him onto the hood of a police car. The car is parked on the side of the curb. It's about 12 feet away. The cop is standing with his back to Christina. He is holding a donut and a cup of coffee (Styrofoam). The cop turns around. The thief comes crashing down on the hood of his car. The cop jumps back. He spills coffee on his shirt. People begin to cheer and applaud. Christina takes the purse from the ground. She does this in a very lady-like fashion. Christina gracefully puts the strap around her gigantic shoulder. She waves daintily to the cop (using the first three fingers on her right hand). Christina: (with a coy smile) Good morning officer. The cop is staring in disbelief. His mouth is wide open. The camera shifts back to Christina's doctor. She is still standing on the sidewalk, gazing down the street with the rest of the spectators. Doctor: (to the camera) Christina, the goddess of justice.